Hi Everyone
My worst fear is happening all over again. The voices are back.
I was totally fine in the morning but at lunch time they hit.
This is what they are saying - they start off with a list of all the bad, stupid etc things I did when I was a teacher, then they say 'you were a crap teacher and you are therefore a crap person and you deserve to die'. They end up telling me to kill myself.
I have been arguing with them all afternoon. I am saying to them that God has saved me and that therefore I deserve to live. And that I am retraining and won't be going near a classroom again. That all the stupid things I did have been forgiven by God Himself.
I am exhausted by all this arguing. I have been to the doctor and the counsellor. They both told me to go to hospital if I get worse.
I don't want to go to hospital! I have spent months building up a positive lifestyle and working hard at my studies. A break in hospital could ruin all that.
Please, please pray for me that these voices will go away.
Thank you
Amber
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Oh Amber, that sounds awful. Keep on fighting them because they're not true, you are God's and you're precious to him and loved. I'll pray for you. Love Nikki
ReplyDeleteOh Amber, I'm so sorry! Those voices are absolutely wrong. You are loved. Take care of yourself, please.
ReplyDeleteMy second daughter has similar problems and so I do understand. It took medications for her to get past them though.
ReplyDeleteStarting with your preciousness before God, you have infinite worth to Him. We all may mess up but the trick is to not only walk away from those foul ups but to also not allow Satan (our accuser!) any voice to remind us. You may well need to be in a communal environment to help you get past this.
Do not go it alone!
Keep those eyes on Jesus. Call on Him for intervention, no argument with those voices, let your only words be to Jesus for His help!
We are here for you dear one, besides The Great One! Rebuke the attack from Satan! Do Not Take Any Part in his evil attacks with your mind. You are a Child of God! You Are Protected By His Blood!!!
ReplyDeleteHe loves you, as we do!
((((Hugs of God))))
I'm praying for you like crazy right now! You are a wonderful, wonderful person and are loved by many people and, most of all, God. Don't lose hope. God will get you through.
ReplyDeletePraying hard,
Blire
Thanks everyone for your support and prayers.
ReplyDeleteThe voices are getting duller now after a day in bed yesterday.
God Bless
Amber
I came over from the Mad Priest's blog to offer a word of support. SO glad the voices are getting duller. Prayers for you! I like the idea of talking straight to Jesus rather than trying to defend yourself to those awful voices. And do reach for whatever help will be most effective.
ReplyDeleteThanks Terri
ReplyDeleteWill check your blog out in a minute
I'm sorry that I had not checked your blog for a few days. Thanks be to God that you're doing better! If those voices ever return, do your best to focus not on them but on the truth. Use the light of God's word to cast out the darkness. (Good, godly counsel and medicine and others' prayers can also help, of course.)
ReplyDeleteA healer who came to my church said that "Demons take hold where there is unhandled pain." It seems as if the emotional pain, which can be handed down thru several generations, allows our brains to attack us, and it piles up and seems like it's other people's voices. In a way it is - since it is pain from our parents, and their parents, and THEIR parents. I found that as I cleared my inner stuff away - and it took quite a bit of therapy and prayer, that the voices went away.
ReplyDeleteAmber, I found your blog by searching on google for myself. I'm a psych student and all i've learned about schizophrenia doesnt match up with me. I heard voices when I was around 7 and they lasted several years. It was not constant, but spontaneous and I understand how frightened you are. I'm sorry. They are wrong. They are trying to break you down, you need to pray that God takes them away. I prayed and prayed and finally God took them away and I have been free since. I thank Him every time it comes to mind now. I'm 30 now. I hope this message finds you at a much better place.
ReplyDeleteAre you a smoking addict and looking forward to quit smoking at the earliest? Or may be you are not eager to induce smoking cessation at the present moment because the pleasure induced by nicotine is weighing heavy on your brain but sooner or later, the ill-effects of smoking would show off and at that point of time, you would be bound to quit smoking at any cost. But getting rid of nicotine addiction is not that easy and only the anti-smoking medicine Chantix can help you. Take chantix as per the instructions of the doctor in order to induce smoking cessation at the earliest and for more information on chantix, log in to the site http://www.chantixhome.com/ .
ReplyDeletehi Ambersun , it really helps a lot too read the nice comments. i hear voices now around 4 years, it all started one night i was watching tv, paddy and vern was on, some love island thing, anyway halfway during the show it was as if they could see me and hear my voice inside their head , too be honest i actually liked it and became too like it more and more . i didnt get any help for it until 16 months ago, went too hospital twice , voices call me things like rapist, sick ole... such and such i was always very very sensitive guy im 28 now single over 3 years have a beautiful wee boy , the voices are saying things i would rother not say. its heart breaking i cannot cope with that , im back living with my parents now after 1 year living alone , my friends where there but not enough,i blame myself for that . i really hope they leave us alone, my thoughts are with you.my prayers... i have really got too do more praying too Jesus Mary God . i will pray for you and people like you Godbless please pray for us
ReplyDeleteThe experience you are describing is very similar to what happened to me a few years ago. Thank god I met a very spiritual lady and she told me how to fight these spirits. Please try to follow my directions; they are not very hard to do. All you need is a Bible, a scarf (white or red color) to cover your head and a candle stick (again white or red color). Cover your head with the scarf, light the candle and read out loud the following psalms from the Bible: 23, 24, 57, 101, 17 in this order. When you finish reading say "our Lord's prayer" out loud. Please do so at least once a day for the first couple of weeks and after that once a day should be enough. Slowly the voices will start to subside and eventually they will disappear completely.
ReplyDeleteThis routine saved my life. I hope it helps you too. Best of luck:)